I know that in the world we live in talking about abstinence is almost laughable to most people. They can’t see the benefits which means that they can’t see the detriment either. To most people a life with no sex is like being punished for something. & Speaking from a woman’s perspective if there is no one admiration or indulging in all that is our beauty and sexuality in our younger years we start to feel like it’s being wasted.
While I have lived most of my life on that side of the fence what I know now it’s this….
The reason why abstaining from sex until marriage is better for us as human beings is because in abstaining your flesh has no association with sex and the satisfaction of it. Therefore the flesh does not crave it.
Yes Your mind may wonder out of curiosity about what the experience is like having never been engaged in the act, but there is no driving FORCE to cause you to act on your curiosity.
On the other hand, once your flesh has been introduced to pleasure, there is now an insatiable need to satisfy that mental and physical recollection that is specific to your first or your best experience of satisfaction which your mind now associates with a specific person.
This is where soul ties come into play. If you allow yourself to experience sexual satisfaction with someone who has no emotional tie or no covenant connection to you then when that person decides to walk away from you they will go but the experiences you shared will linger inside your mind causing you to pursue & compare until you can match or replace it with a better feeling. Your flesh will still be tied to that feeling they provided for you. This makes it easy for you in your weakness to search for that feeling again either in that person making you a slave to them or you will search for it in others and engage in activities that put you in risky situations All for the sake of that high
1 hit
1 dose
That will take you up for a moment but immediately send you crashing back down once you realize you have pleasure but no promise.
Pleasure that is not connected to promise can only bring you pain, shame, and an impure body.
* Pursuing pleasure without purpose is an attempt to satisfy a momentary DESIRES that robs you of your long term NEEDS & goals.
Example: the woman you want to be in your head is one who values her body
The woman you see yourself as is a woman who loves the lord with all her heart and meditate on his laws both day and night
Yet in reality… because you have stepped into sin & you have not yet repented and turned away from the things of the world that have you bondage, you give your body away with no regard for how it effects you. You fill your mind and heart with things that will only send you further into sin and away from the ways of the lord & the dreams you have for yourself.
Aligning your pleasure with purpose
“For it is from within, out of a person’s heart, that evil thoughts come—sexual immorality, theft, murder,”
Mark 7:21 NIV
“You brood of vipers, how can you who are evil say anything good? For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”
Matthew 12:34 NIV
“For out of the heart come evil thoughts—murder, adultery, sexual immorality, theft, false testimony, slander.”
Matthew 15:19 NIV
The best thing you can do for yourself is to change your heart!
You change your heart by first changing your mind.
You change your mind by being selective with the things that you consume (music, movies, social media feed, friends ….) which are the fuel to your thoughts and your thoughts shape the posture of your heart and vice versa.
“Faith comes by hearing”
So whatever you hear and consume the most is what you will have faith in. If your mind is filled with sin and your heart is filled with sin they are inevitably going to be in a constant state of sending sinful/ unhealthy signals back and forth that will have you lost! The world is full of temptation! & the only way to fight is to become anchored.
“Then we will no longer be infants, tossed back and forth by the waves, and blown here and there by every wind of teaching and by the cunning and craftiness of people in their deceitful scheming. Instead, speaking the truth in love, we will grow to become in every respect the mature body of him who is the head, that is, Christ. From him the whole body, joined and held together by every supporting ligament, grows and builds itself up in love, as each part does its work.”
Ephesians 4:14-16 NIV
The lord wants to give you all of the desires of your heart but first we have to stop trying to go out and get the quick fix version of his promises
“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”
Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”
Proverbs 3:5-6 NIV no
Keisha D.
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